What People Revealed About Their ‘Goblin’ Side on First Dates

What People Revealed About Their ‘Goblin’ Side on First Dates

Since the Goblintimacy quiz launched, thousands of people have taken it and shared a bit about how they actually show up (or hide) on early dates.

While the data is still early and self-reported, clear patterns are already emerging. These insights are anonymized and shared here for reflection and entertainment — not as scientific research.

Here is what people are quietly admitting about their “goblin” side on first dates.

Common patterns we’re seeing

1. Most people are performing more than they want to admit A large majority of quiz-takers said they still “edit” themselves on first dates, even though they intellectually know they want to be more real. The most common areas they edit:

• How much they actually eat or what they order
• How nervous or excited they really feel
• Their true weekend habits and comfort level with staying in
• How much they care about the outcome of the date

This gap between what people want to do and what they actually do on dates is one of the biggest sources of dating burnout right now.

2. The “small” things people hide often matter more than the big ones Many people said they are more comfortable sharing big life details than small, everyday truths. Examples of things people commonly hide early:

• That they prefer staying in over going out
• That they have specific comfort foods or routines they’re embarrassed about
• That they get socially drained quickly
• That they’re not actually that into the activity they suggested

These small truths often reveal more about long-term compatibility than dramatic stories do.

3. Cozy Goblin vs Co-Goblin shows up early People who scored higher on Cozy Goblin energy tended to report:

• Strong preference for low-pressure, at-home or casual first dates
• More anxiety about “having to perform” in public settings
• Higher satisfaction when dates felt relaxed and low-stakes

People who scored higher on Co-Goblin energy tended to report:

• Comfort with deeper or more playful conversation earlier
• Less fear of “scaring someone away” with honesty
• Higher tolerance for slightly chaotic or unconventional date ideas

This suggests the two archetypes often have different comfort levels with how quickly and how deeply they want to be seen.

4. The fear of “being too much” is extremely common One of the most frequent open responses was some version of: “I’m worried that if I’m fully myself, they’ll think I’m weird / too intense / not put together enough.”

This fear exists across all ages and genders in the current data. It is one of the biggest barriers to the kind of real connection most people say they actually want.

What these early insights suggest

• The desire for authenticity is very high, but the practice of it is still low for most people.
• Small, everyday honesty often creates more real connection than big dramatic vulnerability.
• People who naturally lean Cozy Goblin may need more intentional permission and low-pressure environments to show up as themselves.
• People who lean Co-Goblin may need to slow down slightly so the other person can keep up.

These patterns line up with what we’ve been writing about in the rest of this blog: goblintimacy is less about being “extreme” and more about closing the gap between who you are and who you show up as on dates.

A note on the data

These insights come from people who chose to take the Goblintimacy quiz. That means the sample is already skewed toward people who are at least curious about being more real in dating. The actual numbers in the general dating population are likely even more heavily weighted toward performance.

As more people take the quiz, we’ll continue sharing updated patterns (always anonymized).

FAQ

Is this real data or just made up? It is real, self-reported data from people who have taken the quiz so far. It is not a formal study, but it reflects the experiences of real people engaging with these ideas.

Will you keep updating these insights? Yes. As the quiz gets more responses, we’ll publish updated observations.

How can I contribute to future insights? Just take the quiz. Your answers help us see broader patterns over time.